


A Little Trouble and a Quick Drive

by moxiemarauder



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Before she was Babs she was Baby, Bruce is basically like her uncle, I dont understand how schools work, I sure don't - Freeform, My First Work in This Fandom, Not Beta Read, bruce wayne is happy, literal child barbara gordon, sometimes you have to consider all of comics history and just take the parts you like, this has been in my head for 7 years, welcome to my batfam au, who knows if i'll even write more
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-13 21:13:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17495477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moxiemarauder/pseuds/moxiemarauder
Summary: Barbara gets into trouble at school and Bruce has to pick her up. She has many questions and most of them get answered.





	A Little Trouble and a Quick Drive

**Author's Note:**

> I've been thinking up my own universe and timeline for the Batfam and Friends, using some comics canon and some headcanons, for the past 7 years. It's grown a lot over that time and I finally decided I should write at least part of it down. I started writing this on a late night 4 hour bus ride from New York to Boston and finished it around 3 am several weeks later. It's a bad title but it's 4 am and i'm tired.

Bruce didn't know how he got on the emergency contact list for little Baby Gordon. He supposed he should be flattered that Jim and Barbara trusted him enough to watch out for their daughter but at 22, he didn't know what to do with a 5 year old. The only thing he did know about 5 year olds is that he hoped he didn't have one of his own.

So when he got a call from her school saying that both parents were unavailable and she needed to be picked up NOW, he freaked out a little nit. Imagined the worst, left his new girlfriend standing in his kitchen with a dozen unanswered questions, drove a little too fast in a car that was a little too expensive, and ran into her school like a bat out of hell. Only to hear she needed to be picked up because she bit another kid.

"That's it? That's the big emergency?"

"She drew blood, Mr Wayne. The child may even need stitches. We take violence among our students very seriously. Barbara is being suspended for the rest of the week."

"She's only in kindergarten, she doesn't understand what that mean. And the whole week? It's only Tuesday!"

"Mr. Wayne, I don't know what they let you get away with at Gotham Academy but we must stop this behavior young. Gotham is getting any better but we'd rather not have our students make it any worse."

Bruce decided not to press his luck any further and just except Barbara's fate. "Alright, I understand. I guess we'll be going now. Is there anything I need to do before we leave?"

"Just sign her out and make sure her parents give us a call at their earliest convenience, if not earlier."

"Yes, ma'am," Bruce said as he signed the paper and walked over to where Barbara was sitting outside the principal's office. "You ready to go, kid?"

Barbara nodded, unusually quiet. When she stood up, she held out her hand, which Bruce took.

As she was leading towards the door, her turned around to wave at the principal. "It was nice meeting you, Mrs. Johnson."

It really wasn't but his mother and Alfred didn't raise him to be rude.

They had just made it out of the school doors when Barbara spoke. "He deserved it."

"Oh, he did?" And what did he do?"

"Pulled my braid and when I asked him to stop her pulled it harder and it really hurt."

"Yeah, that does sound like he deserved it." Remembering what Mrs. Johnson said about behavior, he added, "But you know, when things like that happen, you should tell your teacher or another adult to that they can put a stop to it."

"Do you think Batman would help?" Barbara asked, her eyes lighting up.

"He might." Not knowing whether to encourage or discourage her adoration of his alter ego. She was after all his biggest fan.

"So it looks like we're gonna be hanging out for a few games. And you get to meet my new girlfriend and my best friend."

"I thought i was your best friend?"

"Oh, you are! But Clark and I have been friends since before you were born I've known him almost long as I've known your dad."

"That's a really long time."

She got really quiet as Bruce buckled her in. Did she need a car seat? She was pretty little for her age but maybe if he drove really carefully if wouldn't matter.At least her had had enough mind to drive one of his cars with a backseat.

As soon as Bruce climbed into the driver's seat, Barbara's questions started flying non-stop.

"Where are we going? What's for lunch? You said you had a new girlfriend, is she pretty? What's her name? Is she nicer that the last one? Is she the lady I met at the party? Can we watch a movie? Or play a board game? What's your girlfriend's favorite color? Does she have a cool job? Does Clark have a cool job?"

Bruce waited for her to take a breath before responding. "I can only answer one question at a time, you know?"

"Then are you gonna answer them?" She asked, crossing her arms with a defiant little 'hmph.'

Bruce looked at her in the rear view mirror and laughed quietly to himself before answering.

"We're going to the Manor. I don't know what we're having for lunch but probably peanut butter sandwiches. Her name is Lois. She is very nice and pretty. The woman at the party was Selina, who is just a friend. I don't think I have many movies or board games at the Manor but we can look for them. I don't know her favorite color but you are free to ask. Lois and Clark both work as journalists for the Daily Planet."

"Oh." Barbara went silent again for a few minutes, pulling on her seat belt and trying to get comfortable. "What's a journalist?"

Bruce had been playing with the radio, trying to find a station that was perfectly appropriate for a kid to listen to. He turned down a pop song that seemed innocent enough in order to answer her. "Journalists report the news. Stuff that happens in the world."

Her face suddenly turned very serious. "Is someone gonna report on me not being in school?"

"Of course not. There are kids all over the world that don't go to school. Besides, you'll be back in no time." Bruce wondered, and not for the first time, it he said the right thing to her. How do you explain nuance to a child?

He turned the radio up and the two fell silent. For now, Barbara didn't seem to have anymore questions. The car stayed quiet for the remainder of the ride minus the radio and the occasional kick Barbara sent to the back of his seat.

He parked the car in its space in the garage and looked back at her. "Do you remember the rules for the house?"

She nodded.

"Good and you're gonna be on your best behavior when meeting my friends, right?"

She nodded again, a bit more impatiently this time.

Bruce got out of the front seat and opened the back car door but let Barbara unbuckle herself. She kept fidgeting with her backpack straps on the walk to the house. Opening the garage door to the kitchen, he looked back and said, "Alright kid, you ready?"

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on twitter, maybe- @ mockingmurdock


End file.
